Summing it Up...

Now, that I'm way on the wrong side of sixty, I feel that being true to self is important. "I yam, what I yam." Kindness and smiles are to be given away. Women are strong. Men are more vulnerable than we believe. Husbands may come and go...but one thing I know for sure is that I will NEVAH live without a corgi or coffee in my life if I can prevent it. Come piles of dog fur or hot water!

Wednesday, May 26, 2010

From my friend Karen, in Illinois...

You've heard about people who have been abducted and had their kidneys
removed by black-market organ thieves.

My thighs were stolen from me during the night a few years ago. I went to
sleep and woke up with someone else's thighs. It was just that quick. The
replacements had the texture of cooked oatmeal. Whose thighs were these
and what happened to mine? I spent the entire summer looking for my
thighs. Finally, hurt and angry, I resigned myself to living out my life in
And then the thieves struck again.

My butt was next. I knew it was the same gang, because they took pains to
match my new rear-end to the thighs they had stuck me with earlier. But my
new butt was attached at least three inches lower than my original! I
I'd have to give up my jeans in favor of long skirts.

Two years ago I realized my arms had been switched. One morning I was
fixing my hair and was horrified to see the flesh of my upper arm swing to
and fro with the motion of the hairbrush. This was really getting scary - my
body was being replaced one section at a time. What could they do to me

When my poor neck suddenly disappeared and was replaced with a turkey
neck, I decided to tell my story. Women of the world, wake up and smell the
coffee! Those "plastic" surgeons are using REAL replacement body
parts -stolen
from you and me! The next time someone you know has something
"lifted", look again - was it lifted from you?

THIS IS NOT A HOAX. This is happening to women everywhere every night.


P.S. Last year I thought some one had stolen my Boobs. I was lying in bed
and they were gone! But when I jumped out of bed, I was relieved to see
that they had just been hiding in my armpits as I slept. Now I keep them
hidden in my waistband.


Angela said...

Call the Police!!!! I think they have been at my house too!!!!

Send Help!!!!!

phaedra96 said...

Oh, crap, oh, crap!! It is an epidemic!!!!!

Holly, the Old Western Gal said...


They took my entire body and traded it with a 90-year-old's, I think.

Whosyergurl said...

"Turkey neck." I am so glad that scarves are as popular as they are!
hugs, Cheryl

ClassyChassy said...

OH NO!!! Glad you alerted us to this problem!!! The same things have been happening to me, too!!!

Buttercup said...

They were in New York, too. One morning I got up and my waist had disappeared. And then the thighs and upper arms. Still hanging on to my feet. But I am sure the toe thieves will be here one day, too.

First Draught Farm said...

The band of theives finally broke out of the Southeast and hit the midwest. . . . it's about time. I think this band of hoodlums is led by evildoers such as Paula Deen, Paul Prudhomme (sp) and the like. . . I've been captive for years.

Ms Sparrow said...

What a Hoot! But there's an element of truth in it too. You really do feel robbed of all the things that gave you your sense of wholeness. When those parts of yourself change, your identity starts to slip away.
I think I'll go cry now...

Chatty Crone said...

Oh no - I had the same thief down here in Georgia. What's a woman to do? It's old age or no age. sandie

Pam said...

They're here too! They must be stopped! Hate that under-arm flab hanging around! Good to see you and have a great weekend, my dear!

Donna said...

Now This, was FUNNY!! Thanks for the laugh!!

Coralie Cederna Johnson said...

I know you tell the truth because this crime happened to me too...and I still keep on making those ice box cookies. You'd think I'd learn...but my shelties just don't care. They love me the way I am!

Y'all come back now...

Y'all come back now...

Everyone is special, and counts!